Relocation Woes

With its short, cold days, this season can cause many changes to everyday mood and energy levels. Compound this with struggling as an expat and it’s no wonder that the months following Christmas are often some of the most difficult.

As research into mental health increasingly finds cultural acceptance, phrases like “post-vacation blues” and “seasonal affective disorder” are no longer alien. For many, they are a consequence of living in a climate with changing seasons, a way to articulate that low mood and lack of energy that seem to appear when the summer subsides.

What we often fail to talk about, however, is how these symptoms combine with the challenges of expat life—integrating into a tight-knit local culture, longing for loved ones living far away and navigating the famed Spanish bureaucracy, to name but a few. None of that is meant to brand these issues as abnormal or unsolvable or undermine the fact that we are fortunate enough to be living here in the first place. Yet it’s important to recognize that when moving to an exciting city like Barcelona, we often praise its benefits while underestimating its disadvantages.

Common Themes

Bianca Kelly, an expat originally from Australia, now works as a therapist and coach from her practice here in Barcelona. She spends her time working with expats, specifically, to help them understand and work through a variety of issues. She says, “There is a growing global phenomenon regarding various mental health conditions, which isn’t just the result of improved diagnosis.” Through her various sessions with clients, Bianca has come to value the experiences that expats tend to share in common. Rather than undermining an individual’s experience as one of many, these recurring themes tell us something about the collective and how we might move forward. “Low mood and anxiety often arise from difficulties in identity, belonging and personal relationships,” she says. “There is a lot of pressure to be having a good time, coupled with the fact that discussing one’s mental health remains taboo in many circles.”

The most commonly reported sources of anxiety and stress were local bureaucracy (53%), living away from friends and family (45%), financial (39%) and living in a new culture and language (38%).

The feelings of alienation that are a normal part of relocation can persist long after a move, and Bianca is concerned about the capacity for technology to amplify these feelings. She says that, paradoxically, social media can act as both a buffer and an enhancer of feelings of isolation.

“While social media allows us to stay connected from afar, it can also serve as a distraction that prevents people from fully integrating. Having extended video calls with people back home at strange times, for instance, could come at the cost of heading out to an event and meeting new people. Also, friendship is a process that takes time and isn’t as instant as accepting a friend request might lead us to believe.”

While these sorts of discussions may be familiar, either through direct experience or someone in a social circle, murmurs arise when people decide to talk about mental health and offer no quantification of the problem.

Increased Awareness

Sensing this void, James Cormack, an anxiety and stress specialist hailing from the U.K., recently conducted a preliminary study to help begin to quantify the state of expat mental health in Barcelona. “Awareness has been improving in recent years, but there's a long way to go.” James recruited over 100 participants to complete an initial online questionnaire exploring the types of stress and anxiety experienced by expats, as well as identifying the most common causes and self-professed solutions.

Among James’ participants, 33% said that life is more stressful here than back at home, while only 20% reported lower levels of stress. He says, “The dream of a chilled out expat lifestyle, less stressful than life back home, is in question.” Similar to what Bianca finds in her coaching sessions, there seems to be an expectation that moving here will alleviate stress and, when this fails to materialize, feelings of stress can instead amplify.

“Longer-term, integrating more into the local culture and language seems to be a good predictor of long-term satisfaction.” —James Cormack

The most commonly reported sources of anxiety and stress were local bureaucracy (53%), living away from friends and family (45%), financial (39%) and living in a new culture and language (38%). The self-professed solutions, meanwhile, included meeting people and socializing (54%), spending time in nature (47%) and taking part in sports (44%).

In many ways, these results are not surprising, particularly to those who have gone through the process of transitioning into Barcelona life. Yet it is reassuring to learn that these problems are common and that we can act as agents of the solution. As James comments: “We shouldn’t think about the city as determining our quality of life here as an expat. Our individual lifestyle and mindset are more important. We can’t control Barcelona, but we can control our lifestyle.”

Resilience

“Longer-term, integrating more into the local culture and language seems to be a good predictor of long-term satisfaction,” he says. The respondents of James’ study reported feeling more at home when they were better integrated with locals, regardless of whether or not they deliberately took an active role in their local community.

Even so, many expats lack information on where to turn for help in times of need. 49% of respondents had no idea where to even find support, meanwhile only 2% reported that they had experienced a high quality of support. Beyond the solid advice surrounding cultural integration and spending time in nature, James recommends some good ol’ stoic wisdom.

“While social media allows us to stay connected from afar, it can also serve as a distraction that prevents people from fully integrating." —Bianca Kelly

“What expats really need,” he says, “is similar to what all people need: resilience. The ability to deal with the inevitable problems, frustrations, imperfections in life, so that while they might be unhappy at times, they can know they're okay and they're able to work on getting the best possible solution, now and in the future. Anxiety and stress are actually created by our mind. I believe it's changing how our mind works that can most effectively reduce that stress and anxiety.”

Bianca agrees with the notion of becoming comfortable with discomfort. “Low mood is part of the everyday ebbs and flows of life—let’s normalize it. Be honest with people in your community and people back home. Friendships take time. Keep working on it, be mindful of your social media usage and get a good night’s sleep. If you’re managing a business, consider offering activities like language classes to help foster communities. And, of course, if you’re finding it hard, speak with a professional.”

Bianca Kelly is a coach at La Rambla Expat Therapy. Find out more at laramblatherapy.es.

James Cormack is an anxiety and stress specialist. Find out more at james-cormack.com.