Valerian and the City of a Thousand Planets ###-1/2
It’s been twenty years since Luc Besson, the director of this film, released his sci-fi opus The Fifth Element. He was ready for more, it seems, and the first thing I thought as I watched this new amazing world come to life was that many of the CGI produced-images felt, and even looked, a lot like James Cameron’s Avatar. In the 28th century, the ISS has become the city of Alpha, where millions of beings from different planets coexist in harmony. Through a series of world vortices and impeccable special effect shots, Besson churns out a film with a host of actors whose mission revolves around fetching a Mül convertor, which has the ability to duplicate whatever it comes into contact with. Main stars Cara Delevigne, who is just as good at acting as modelling, and Dane DeHaan play Sgt. Laureline and Major Valerian, take us on this thrilling adventure. Other major stars feature in this film as well, including Clive Owen, Ethan Hawke, Rihanna and Herbie Hancock, all having select roles. Besson has managed to inject emotional quality and semblance of wonder back into sci-fi spectacle with this film.
The Dark Tower ##-1/2
“Ummm,” I muttered as I wandered from the screening…what was all that? Starring Matthew McConaughey as The Man in Black and Idris Elba as Gunslinger Roland Deschain, this film takes its cue from so many nonsensical Holywood ideas. It is at least somewhat palatable, if dull. I’m just saddened to see that it comes from Stephen King’s genius mind. The studio idea is to first serialise his work with a film, and secondly, to develop a television franchise. We’re talking about an 8-novel series, which fuses plenty of lurid action into a rather concise but not-well-organised film. Tom Taylor plays lead character Jake Chambers, a somewhat troubled kid whose dreams force him to hunt the two aforementioned men. Now while he’s searching and plotting along with Elba, McConaughey is looking for little Jake. It’s all rather fuddled in and a bit muddled in just around 90 minutes, and you have to think? THAT out of eight novels? Something smells fishy.
The Beguiled ####
This latest film by Sofia Coppola comes with a bit of drama at the get-go for its lack of inclusion of any people of color as the original story did. Though, Coppola immediately addressed the issue by saying that having another African-American depicted in an unflattering light was not what she wants her female and younger audiences to see, especially now. Good save. The ending of this film is spectacular, and really leaves a sense of awe and wonder. Honestly, the fantastic ensemble cast of Nicole Kidman, Coppola stalwart Kirsten Dunst, Elle Fanning and Colin Farrell make for such a captivating, at times awkward, at times even darkly humorous film. Her best work? Not necessarily, but good. When a union officer stumbles severely wounded into a girls’ school, the question is whether to treat him or call the Confederates. They choose the former and nurse him to health, and the affairs can then begin. But so does the evil mistrust and craziness, and when all's said and done, it’s quite apparent that any kind of war is absolutely good for no one and nothing, and neither are secrets.
The Emoji Movie #-1/2
I recall critiquing The Angry Birds Movie last year, astounded that an app or anything related to this digi-world had been made into a big-screen film. Thing was…that film was hilarious and wickedly intelligent. This sorry excuse of a message movie, however, falls so short, that it is quite obvious that no one knew what they were putting together. Even such an outstanding cast, starring a wide array of talent, including Anna Faris, Maya Rudolph, T.J. Miller, Christina Aguilera, Sofia Vergara, Patrick Stewart…honestly the list goes on. They must have known the script was terrible, revolving around a ‘meh’ emoji named Gene, who lives in some teen’s smartphone and sets out on an adventure ‘within’ by setting out to discover how he can become a normal meh emoji like his parents. Insert poop, happy, sad, blah blah blah emojis and stir in with idiotic references and wannabe comical moments, which aren’t, and voila! Recipe for one of the worst animated films released in recent history.