We arrive at 10.30pm because there was no room for us at the first sitting. This doesn’t go down terribly well as I’m not a big fan of double sittings. If you arrive early you feel hassled out of there. If you arrive late your appetite is waning and you’ve probably had a cocktail too many to enjoy it anyway.

When we arrive there are two empty tables, and ours is wedged up so close to the bar it’s practically under it. But still, the place had a convivial air that made me want to like it. There were chocolate-coloured velvet banquettes along the back wall, nicely laid tables, a bustle and a buzz that told you this was somewhere really rather good. And the smells were tantalising. The menu at Bohèmic is all about inventive, slightly-bigger-than-tapas-sized dishes, cunningly designed to make you want them all.

Just as I was contemplating this conundrum though, a water menu arrived, which made me want to spit with rage. Don’t they know that bottled water is the biggest con since Ocean’s Eleven robbed the vault at Belaggio? The equivalent of an environmental elephant in the room, this particular list featured water from all over the world paraded about like it is vintage champagne. It’s not. It’s water.

Someone please tell me, who in their right minds pays six euros for a bottle of Fiji, when for two euros more you could knock yourself out on the house red? And more to the point, why are we paying the logistical cost of designer water when there are towns up the road brimming with perfectly good water sources of their own? I’m not going to claim that Barcelona tap is particularly tasty, but honestly I had to be restrained from nipping out to Spar for a bottle of Veri.

Next, a huge song and dance was made about the Maldon salt. Oh please. Bring on Es Trenc, or Ibiza, or even something from the Carmargue, but Maldon is from the British Midlands for goodness’ sake and seemed plain wrong in a place that prides itself on its Catalan roots. I’ll say it again, shall I: we’ve got loads of good stuff right here on our doorsteps.