LIVING

“In hospital, there is a sense of being on a timetable. You are much more likely to be induced and given synthetic oxytocin, the ‘love’ hormone that the body produces naturally to make the uterus contract and to help you bond with your child, to speed things up.

“This almost always leads to an epidural. Yet the body can usually do everything naturally if it is left to get on with it.”

Esther offers classes in hypnobirthing, a self-hypnosis process that aficionados claim gives them a joyful birth, rather than a horrific one. “Suffering does not have to be a natural part of labour,” said Esther, who used hypnobirthing for the birth of her second child. “The birth of my first child was long and hard work, but this method really helped me relax, feel good about the birth and, more importantly, feel in control. That is so often not the case and while a mother should be able to be direct and get what she wants, she often feels powerless.”

This is when a doula can be indispensable, as Viktoria Löwenthal, a doula from Sweden, notes. “The doctors are not trying to be mean when they are working,” she said. “They are professionals, and for them, [medical intervention] is the safe way, very fast and very clean, Monday to Friday, when everything is covered. When people have a doula at their side, however, they know they have somebody supporting them, giving them extra energy, someone speaking up for them, who knows what you want because you have spoken about it with her in advance.”

The husband or boyfriend also needs to feel relaxed, Viktoria says, which is why she offers classes for pregnant women and their partners to help them prepare, based on the Swedish ‘Annas Profylax’ concept.

“This teaches people what to expect in labour, breathing and relaxation exercises, massage techniques and also how coaching and visualisation can be used. It’s very focused and we always involve the partners as much as possible,” she said. “We go through the different phases of labour, looking at them in a calm way, and we look at the contractions as a positive force rather than something to be scared of. We all want to say “no, no, no” at first, but without them, you wouldn’t see your baby, so we focus on that! Labour is painful, there’s no getting away from that, but I try to separate the pain from suffering. When you get to the point where you want to quit, you know you are almost there!